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 Alvy ironclad

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alvy



Posts : 5
Join date : 2011-06-07

PostSubject: Alvy ironclad   Tue Jun 07, 2011 1:28 am

Points: 0 (Leave as 0)


Name:Alvy Ironclad
Nindo: crush every thing in my way to carve a new road of the future
Age: 18
Gender:male
Appearance: stands around 6'6"
Spoiler:
 
Personality: Alvy personality is one that is rather odd in many ways. He by no means is ashamed to do things. Hes rather out going some time. As a pass time her likes to make up nicknames for people. While he may act rather dimwitted and not very bright he is very good with combos with his attacks. Hes very good when he wants to be, but he tends to come more off as a ass clown then any thing.

Hes afraid of his mother and women just like her. Because shes got a temper he also developed her short fuse for a temper making it very easy for him to get angry. He likes to mock people be hide their backs to make the people trying to talk seem retarded in some ways. He gets rather nervous around girls who act kind to him. He says it puts him in a awkward moment.


Rank: genin
Village: konaha
Chakra Affinity: earth
Second Chakra Affinity:
Third Chakra Affinity: Only at S-Rank
Specialization:
  • Taijutsu



Inventory: 15 kunai and one Lage 8 sided shurekin.

Weapon:



Jutsu
all the basic academy jutsu,
gigaton punch
- A technique utilizing the users own strength
- Handseals: a closed fist. its a family made jutsu
- Rank: D
- Effect: all this dos is waste ones stamina by fousing all their energy they have in to one powerful punch. wearing protective armor help the user not damage their hand. this is strong enough to break some ones bones if used right



History:
Alvy's family is know for there high and shear raw power per pound. The families only in the past 20 years has moved in to the leaf village. Only a hand full have ever actually tried to be a ninja. But they showed a real lack for the ninja arts because most of them didn't grow up learning them. Their heritage is more from crossed the sea far past the mist village. They where armor and weapon smiths. Alvy being born 2 years after they moved in to the leaf was trained as a ninja. Though he failed many times in the academy he was then pulled out when he was 16 his father told the village he was going to teach his some control.

During the year of training Alvy didn't make much friends. But he did learn how to have fun when even put under many pressures. He had to many times had to kill a live animal with his own hands. His father told him no to hesitate as doing it to a human is much much harder. Alvy slowly made a game out of his training, he used his left arm the most for punching with armor on it. He was always trying to think he was the strongest there was, but he knew better.

After one year of intensive training with his father he learned to control his strength. Coming back he was finally able to pass the class with out having a fit. He was proud he finally passed the class. But he was still only new to the dangers he would have to face but what helped him the most is his father told him he give him a sword from the distant lands from over the seas. One with the power to make his dreams come true if he only believe he could do it.


Last edited by alvy on Sun Jun 12, 2011 3:01 am; edited 4 times in total
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alvy



Posts : 5
Join date : 2011-06-07

PostSubject: Re: Alvy ironclad   Wed Jun 08, 2011 12:35 am

done i think
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PostSubject: Re: Alvy ironclad   Wed Jun 08, 2011 5:53 pm



Welcome to Project Naruto Alvy!

Before I can give your application the final approval, first I need to run through some errors or issues in your character. They're quite simple mistakes and wont take long to correct.

  • Although it's alright for your character to be Eighteen and still be the rank of Genin, are you sure you want your character to be at this age? Considering that we do have Jounin at that age, so it may seem slightly odd, not to mention some Genin are eight years younger then you.

  • Could you please go through both your Personality and History and include apostrophes where needed, it makes it that bit more easier to understand. Can you also correct several spelling mistakes in both sections, if you wish to fix these then simply use Word to find the errors.

  • You've listed TaiJutsu as your specialty meaning you can't have any NinJutsu techniques. So please either remove your NinJutsu techniques or replace TaiJutsu with NinJutsu.

  • For your custom weapon, you haven't provided a description or an image for it's appearance. Please provide an actual rank for the weapon as well, not just 'Genin and up', it must be either E, D, C, B, A or S Rank. I'm also very confused by the Special Ability section of it, please re - write or re - word it so it's understandable. By the sounds of it, you can transform your sword into three different shapes? That is definitely not a Genin weapon.

  • If you're struggling for information on your History think about your characters childhood, what were his favorite activities? did anything life changing happen to him? what did your character do during this 'intense training'?


Just have this list fixed up please and I'm sure it'll be approve - able!
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alvy



Posts : 5
Join date : 2011-06-07

PostSubject: Re: Alvy ironclad   Wed Jun 08, 2011 10:26 pm

umm i have one question... just becuase one cant use ninjutsu dos that mean i cant have chakra control??

another i did use word when i wrote the history and personality. i just that bad with grammar long story... and i will fix it up.

and the weapon thing i was going to do that but i was testing you people on your abilitys to notice things. cid was right it is a site full of him for admins XD haha good finally admins who look stuff over.

yes i do want him to be this age. one becuase where he is this age that means his body has a much higher limatations compaired to his younger team mates.


and all this was a rush job so i could get the spot in squad 13 becuase i rushed i did for get to do alot of good detail.
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alvy



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PostSubject: Re: Alvy ironclad   Fri Jun 10, 2011 6:48 pm

ok ookami if you see any grammar issues please point them outl... i have run it through word but it dos not see any thing wrong...
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PostSubject: Re: Alvy ironclad   Sat Jun 11, 2011 8:50 am

Ookami wrote:


  • You've listed TaiJutsu as your specialty meaning you can't have any NinJutsu techniques. So please either remove your NinJutsu techniques or replace TaiJutsu with NinJutsu.

  • For your custom weapon, you haven't provided a description or an image for it's appearance. Please provide an actual rank for the weapon as well, not just 'Genin and up', it must be either E, D, C, B, A or S Rank.

  • I wont be accepting a sword that can change form so easily and yet it's meant for a Genin to handle. A sword that could change it's form and properties would be of an A / S Rank ability. Like we discussed earlier, if you want to have a sword on a chain, then that's fine. But I wont allow you to have a sword that can change itself entirely.


Just have this list fixed up please and I'm sure it'll be approve - able!

Please actually edit what I ask you to edit.
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alvy



Posts : 5
Join date : 2011-06-07

PostSubject: Re: Alvy ironclad   Sun Jun 12, 2011 3:08 am

i deleted the sword for now. anf i changed the jutsu around to make it seem more like taijutsu. ?
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PostSubject: Re: Alvy ironclad   Sun Jun 12, 2011 12:13 pm

Approved.
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